I am blogging over at Ohio Moms Blog today

My post is about saying Yes to my kids more often. Below is a snipit from the post

……..As my kids and family size grew so did my impatience! “No” had become my knee jerk answer.  “Can I ……NO!”   “Will you….NO!” I started sounding much like a toddler with a new and powerful word and I imagine it was really irritating for my kids! Soon my predictable yet arbitrary NO had lost its power.

I think I am going to write more about this soon. Saying yes is just the begining, the start of so many possibilities.

It ended up being dinner for 2 tonight, so I made it extra special….because she ’s worth it!

Wednesday night on Discovery Health at 8:00PM there is going to be a Radical Unschooling piece as part of a Radical Parenting episode. Sarah Parent of Clan of Parents and her family were filmed to be part of the show. Her blog has more details on the filming process.

I am still floating around on my post conference high! I am re-reading Deschooling Our Lives and I just picked up Nurture Shock and Raising Our Children Raising Ourselves from the library tonight. I am also LOVING these podcasts called Whatever, Whatever Amen!!! Our local unschooling group is getting together so we can  watch this Astra Taylor lecture together and discuss it. I have already watched it once-it is long but well worth it. Very inspiring!!

Any body have any other recommendations for unschooling books, blogs, podcasts or websites I should be checking out?

Sometimes I don’t even know what I need. I go looking for one thing and find another. Sometimes I cast that odd other thing aside thinking I don’t need it and sometimes I hold on to it for dear life, like a new treasure to add to my collection. But funny thing is, that collection has to start somewhere. Often times it begins with a second or third or fourth exposure  (because sometimes I am slow, stubborn or deaf)  to that odd other thing that I cast away earlier. It keeps popping up and continues to catch my eye and then fills my thoughts and I begin to obsess over it. Then I go back searching for those tidbits I tossed aside earlier. I sort through stuff trying to remember wear I saw it. I find other things along the way to add in and after some back tracking and hard work I have the beginnings of a wonderful collection.

For years I have  had this vision of what I wanted my family to be. It sort of looks like an old Kodachrome, or an 8mm movie camera playing a film of strawberry blond kids, happily running through a meadow. Ridiculous, I know. But I am a visual person and the part that sticks out in that picture for me is the happiness and joy part of the picture. The part that I feel is missing from my picture,  my family.

At the end of 2009 I told my friends that I was turning over a new leaf. I was going to be a nicer person. When really I meant I was going to find MY joy and happiness. I think I have been looking for it in all the wrong places. No one is going to bring it to me, it’s not in a book or off of a shelf. Recently I  realized it  has been with me all along. And I didn’t even know it. Happiness really is a choice, it is within my power to just Be Happy. Stepping outside of my normal response or mind set is just a beginning of bringing on that  happiness.

I am going to tie this all together I promise!

Last week we attended The Unschoolers Winter Water Park Gathering for 4  days. This is the third year we have attended but this is the longest we have stayed and the most actual conference sessions we have attended.  These speakers said exactly what I needed to hear. Not what I wanted mind you, but what I needed. We rehashed these conference discussions 12 billion times over the next several days and a funny thing happened-I went from being dumbfounded and even pissed off a little to questioning and  then more discussion and then to an openness that I didn’t anticipate in the least.  See, unschooling is about so much more than just not doing school. It’s even more than just letting your kids decide how they want to fill their time and how they want to dress or not cut their hair and dye it blue. I knew that, but I learned again that  it is so much more also.   This is not the first, second, third or even tenth time I have read or heard or even been exposed to Radical Unschooling but it is the first time I actually listened to it.

I am not much in to  “the Secret” but that’s just me casting aside the odd thing for the second or third time now. But holy crap…I heard what I was searching for. Fate maybe? I do believe in fate. I didn’t consciously  put it out there, I wasn’t looking for joy at this conference. I was hoping to hear something other than Yes, your unschooler is learning all they need to know, Yes they can go to college, Yes, they will be functioning adults.  But not that I have the power to be happy and joyful right inside me-this whole time! I was there to hear about unschooling- Well I guess I  did put it out there that I wanted to talk about meatier subjects. I wanted a seasoned unschoolers discussion-even worse I helped lead that discussion. (But I am still not sure about “The Secret!”)

Of course I am living off the conference high since we returned but life feels easier and lighter.  Changing MY attitude goes a long way (about 90%) and simply realizing a few things:

*  Everything is a choice-I don’t have to do anything but I can choose to do it (the dishes, taking the dogs out for the 12th time in a row etc..)  Once I choose to do something it takes away the chore or dread and unpleasantness of it. I always thought this was stupid-just psycho babble-I have been humbled!

* Saying Yes  not my knee jerk No-OMG that makes life so much easier!!!!  HELL-O

*Simplifying and lowering expectations goes a long way in lowering stress levels and making everyone happier. -Duh

*My kids don’t care about the future (or the clean house or all the time it took me to plan, get, prepare and clean up food), they care about NOW (they want me NOW, not when I finish something else, to be present NOW,  not listening with one ear while multi-tasking) And they really want me-to spend time with them-what a huge compliment. I should  feel honored that they want to hang out with me!

*My family doesn’t have an agenda or pre meditated reasons for leaving their stuff around, It has nothing to do with me (detachment)so why be resentful??!

So much of this may seem obvious but it has really been a light bulb switching on for me. Some of it is just looking at things differently.  In a nutshell-I went looking for what I thought was Unschooling info and came home with so much more. So much information that I cast away as craziness  or just didn’t pay attention to while hearing it over and over again.  My collection is beginning to grow, so many new treasures and I plan to hold on to each new piece for dear life.

(My husband wants to know why it took me 1,000 words to say this! It was cathartic, honey!)

I am on a soup kick lately. I love soup and found a cook book of the same name, LOVE SOUP. I can’t say my family loves all this crazy soup making as much as I do. They are a chicken noodle bunch-but not me. Not this winter. This winter I am branching out!!

KALE AND SWEET POTATO SOUP WITH CUMIN AND LEMON

serves 6 generously (again thinking I have different serving size standards)

2 large leeks-white and light green part

1 large yellow onion

2 T olive oil

1 1/2 tsp salt

12 oz sweet potatoes

1-2 small white or yellow potatoes

12 oz kale

4 green onions

1 bunch cilantro

freshly ground pepper

2 or more cups of veg broth

1 T cumin seeds

cayenne

Coarsely chop leeks and onion.  Saute onion  in olive oil with a dash of salt, when soft add leeks cook stirring often for about 20 mins or until soft.

Meanwhile, peel sweet potato and chop both types potatoes into 1/2 inch dice. Chop kale and combine with potatoes in pot with about 5 cups of water and teaspoon of salt. Bring to a boil then simmer 15 mins (or less)

Add the leeks and onions along with sliced green onions, cilantro and lots of freshly ground pepper. Add as much veg broth as you need to give soup a nice consistency.  Simmer about 10 minutes

Lightly toast cumin seeds in dry pan just until fragrant and then grind with mortar or spice grinder. Stir in cumin and a spoonful of lemon juice.  Add more salt, red pepper and lemon juice to taste

ladle into bowls-add a heaping spoonful of tangy cheese-I used goat  chevre and a heavy sprinkle of red pepper flakes

Excellent!!!

Sorry for the lack of posts but I’ve been having computer issues. Hopefully it’s all fixed now!

This recipe may seem a bit time consuming, but once you make the curry paste it’s smooth sailing! And the curry paste recipe will keep for months in the fridge so next time you want to make this it will be even more simple!

Both of these recipes came from my new favorite cook book FEEDING THE WHOLE FAMILY

Homemade Curry Paste

makes 2 cups

1 cup extra virgin olive oil, 1 lb onion finely chopped, 1/4 cup whole cumin seeds, 1/4 cup whole coriander seeds,       1 teaspoon whole fenugreek seeds, 1 teaspoon whole cloves, 2 teaspoons black peppercorns, 2 Tablespoons whole mustard seeds, 2 teaspoons allspice, 1 teaspoon cardamom, 4 teaspoons ground cinnamon,  1/4 cup turmeric,               2 teaspoons cayenne, 1/4 cup peeled, finely chopped ginger.

whew-that’s a lot of spices!!

Heat the oil and saute the onion until very soft.

While the onions are cooking, grind the following whole spices to a fine powder in a coffee or spice grinder— cumin, coriander, fenugreek, cloves, peppercorns and mustard. Add to the onions along with all the other spices and ginger. Let cook for 5 minutes while stirring.

Store in sealed jar in the fridge for several months.

OK now on to the GREENS IN CASHEW CURRY SAUCE

1/4 cup cashew butter (I made this real quick in my food processor), 1 Tablespoon homemade curry paste, 1 Tablespoon tamari or shoyu, 3/4 cup filtered water, 2 cups quick boiled greens.

Blend cashew butter, curry paste, tamari and water in blender until creamy (I used my food processor)

Combine greens and blended sauce in a pan and gently heat before serving.

I chopped up a bunch of kale, chard and raabini and added it to about 1/4 to 1/2 cup of boiling water in my cast iron skillet with a top on it for a few minutes to steam.

Then I added the sauce.

I had some left over quinoa and added that to the greens and sauce.

I ate this for dinner several times this week. And now that I have 2 cups of homemade curry paste in my fridge, I can just whip this up real quick!

The week between Christmas and New Years. I am feeling like I am on vacation. We don’t have too many commitments this week. We still have family visiting and a few more Holiday events to look forward to.  I might put some stuff away or not. I might start an organizational project or not. I might just stay in my jammies and eat cookies until I have to be somewhere at 7pm tonight!

But this is what the past week or so has looked like!

I made a cool mosaic at Big Huge Labs, but couldn’t get it to work! So you have to settle for a few photos posted haphazardly.

We have new games to play, books to read, a new trampoline covered in snow that needs to be jumped on, movies to watch, new toys to play with and lots of treats that still need to be eaten. What do you plan to do with your week between?

We  have been very busy around here!! We read Sun Bread by Elisa Kleven and used her recipe to make a little sun of our own! I love, love, love her books. The illustrations are beautiful.

We made tin can lanterns

We made fire starters by dipping pine cones into melted bees wax

And we made these beautiful bees wax lanterns to hold a small tea light, by repeatedly dipping a water balloon in melted bees wax.

And then there has been the baking…………….

And the eating of course!

We are almost ready but still have a few last minute things to prepare and gather. Looking forward to the next week full of celebrations with friends and family from both near and far. We’re almost there!! Almost………