Earlier this summer I was invited to a  pre-party of our local libraries summer reading program. My kids have always participated in this program. We are a family of readers so it is really a no brainer for us. Reading = get free stuff. Yet,  I didn’t go to the pre party because really in theory I am totally against the idea of rewarding kids with tokens and or coupons for reading. Yes=I am a bit of a party pooper. No, I don’t over analyze everything and get on my soap box tooting my horn at every main stream activity! But I saw this post on Controversial Summer Reading Programs and it gave me just the nudge I needed to finally come out of the closet.

Now, don’t get me wrong I LOVE our library and I especially love my local branch.  We visit our library as well as other neighborhood libraries often. We rely on our library and appreciate all they do for us. But I just can’t get comfortable rewarding kids (or adults) for reading.  I didn’t (still don’t) want my librarians to know this-I am embarrassed to admit this to them. I just don’t have very high hopes that they could even begin to understand my reasons. They see me as one of their best patrons and I feel like I am letting them down by knocking  their attempts to get kids into the library and reading more. Rewards for this, rewards for that, rewards for reading over the summer too?  There must be a better way.

I don’t live in the dark-I realize that most every family  lives by these arbitrary rewards.  ( Some may even try to call them incentives.)  Homes and schools are run this way; allowance for chores, stickers for pizza parties, candy for potty training, money or presents for good grades.   I call them –just another way to coerce kids into doing what adults want. It’s all a cover up kids!!

Back to reading programs–It is true that these programs start off working as an incentive to read or at least to check out more books. (which is great for libraries–higher circulation is a primary goal of libraries. Higher circulation = more money)  Kids gear up by visiting the library and checking out lots of books and that is a great thing! Then  for 20 minutes–(checking the clock the whole time) they/you  read a book and then get to mark off a square. How many times do they bring that sheet to you asking, “Can I mark off another one? Can you read some more—-so I can mark off another one?”  See what I am getting at? It may seem like it’s all for the love of reading but it’s not–it’s for the love of filling in the stupid square and the the stupid free bookmark or  book bag or back pack that they are rewarded for finishing the summer reading program. How many parents get pissed off and just tell their kids–”Fine! Just mark off 1 square!”  *(clue #1 -kids know if they finish quickly they will get their reward)

I wonder if this reading enthusiasm wanes after they get that backpack?  We hope not-we hope the Summer reading Program turns kids into “readers” but it is doubtful that book marks and bike raffles are going to have that lasting effect on young readers.* (clue #2-once kids get there prize they are not keeping up the frantic reading pace) There is an alternative.  Really, you can avoid all those yucky feelings about keeping track of the chore called The Summer Reading Program.

As I said earlier–We are readers and my kids participate in the summer reading program and yet I am against rewards for reading. But I have a sneaking suspicion other families are going about filling in there squares a little differently than we are. As  readers, we read books, the newspaper, magazines, listen to books on tape as well as podcasts. We read while on the computer and while playing games and writing out lists or following directions both in the car at the grocery and while texting and while cooking.  These same encounters with reading are happening in your family too I bet. Reading is reading. Not just when you set the timer and read from a book.  Sort of how you can’t stop learning new things, and how school isn’t the only place to learn them. Well the summer reading program, like schools leads you to believe that reading occurs in a box  and rewarding this not only takes the enjoyment out of it but it belittles the sheer act of reading by placing an extrinsic reward on it.  I know I am a party pooper! I love a good book and totally love snuggling up with my kids to share a story. And I am all for that kind of reading too!! (I know there is a difference between reading a book and day to day literacy) But for us, ALL reading counts towards those little squares. If my kids ask if they can fill in a square I always say of course you can! See, it doesn’t matter if the timer was set or the reading was taken from a library book. You can feel just fine in saying “Yes to the square”–it’s not cheating. Use it as an opportunity to show your kids just how much they are reading. Probably more than you and they think!

So, we don’t keep track of how long my kids read from a book that someone else deems as legitimate reading material and thinking I need to make sure my kids are following the rules of the program or keeping it secret that I let little Johnny fill in a few extra squares (even though we quit reading at 15 minutes instead of 20).  In the end it is all about the prizes for the kids. Yes, they may be reading more for a short time during the summer but isn’t there a better way other than tricking them into it? And why does reading have to be a competitive sport? Isn’t it meant for totally selfish purposes?! Getting the facts and pure enjoyment?

I am not fooled by these programs–we read all the time. We feel fine filling in the squares and taking advantage of the coupons that we can use to get good stuff! I don’t use these programs to coerce my kids into pressured reading for extrinsic rewards. If you think I am batty-which is fine-you can check out what best selling author, Alfie Kohn has to say on the subject!! There are studies that prove these reward based programs are even hurting your summer reading program participants.

Can’t libraries offer new and exciting programs to lure kids in. Come on–get with the times. Kids read while playing video games!! Bring in some game designers and pull some of those books off the shelves. No, they may not be the classics but they are full of words and kids like them! Have an American Girl Summer Reading Club complete with doing some of the crafts from the books-reading the directions as well as the stories. Have a skate boarding or break dancing demo with those non fiction books pulled as well as those that lead the demo share some of their favorite books.  Have a rapping story time. Wouldn’t that be awesome?! Comic book writers could hold a workshop also. ( I am full of ideas if you want to hire me!!!)

I know there is so much more that is behind those little boxes that I don’t have answers to. Not all kids  live in literacy rich homes. But really , it is just not right to give kids stickers for reading. Don’t be fooled by thinking success equals a high number of participants and circulation. Don’t be fooled that these programs are producing kids that love to read. Maybe these summer readers are really fooling you-

*clues #1 and #2 show just how kids know how to work this rewards system

Yes-that’s right there really is a National Learn Nothing Day and it is today July 24.  So let’s take the day off from learning today, give ourselves a break. It’s only one day-surely we can slow down  for just one day to take it easy and learn absolutely nothing.

If schooled kids can take the whole summer off and do nothing, unschoolers can can take just one day.

(Did you even know there was a National Learn Nothing Day?-Well there you go you already failed! Try again!)

How will you learn nothing today? or any day???????  Good luck

My husband and I both grew up in Cleveland. I don’t think we thought we lived in such a rockin’ place when we were younger. Last weekend we went home for a visit. I love being a tourist in this city! So much to see and do!!

Friday we took the kids to our old favorite hang outs on Coventry (the Greenwich village of Cleveland). Most are gone now and the crowd isn’t quite so hippy but it was still fun. Playing at the playground and eating dinner at Tommy’s. We need a Tommy’s here in Clintonville. It would surely do a bang up business!!! Pretty Pleeeeeze???

Saturday we headed to the newly renovated and free Art Museum. It is awesome!!!

Then we headed to The Botanical Gardens. I can’t say enough good things about the Hershey Children’s Garden. We could play there all day.

Look –apparently Ginger has a twin in Cleveland

Saturday night we took my in laws to Sokolowski’s to eat.  On the recommendation of Anthony Bourdain of course– we got in touch with our Polish heritage!

Sunday morning we boarded The Rapid and headed to the Terminal Tower for a view from the observation deck. It has been closed since 9/11 and is only open for a few weekends.

Just about everyone in Cleveland had the same idea! We waited in kine for 1 hour and 45 minutes. Ginger was not happy

The ride up didn’t get much better

But the views were so cool! Cleveland really does rock! The ethnicity, the history and the big city feel.

Thanks Cleveland!  We will  be back soon!

While clicking around in the  Summer edition of Rhythm of the Home, I came across this awesome idea!! As soon as I saw the photos  my heart skipped a beat and I started making a thrift store list for our own mud pie kitchen!!

It didn’t take us long to find just what we needed!!

First, I picked a nice shady spot in our yard. Not too far from the hose and close to lots of dirt and sand, sticks and leaves. All the essentials for good, messy fun. Something my kids love!

Next,  we headed to the thrift store to stock our kitchen—think little and cheap. Pots, pans, muffin tins, cups, bowls, silverware…..

These make the perfect little molds and were only 30 to 50 cents a piece! Besides the fact they are pretty and shiny!!

More pretty, shiny, cheap staples that every kitchen must have… a beautiful bright yellow tea pot and pitcher.

The appliances were a little more tricky to find. It took a second trip to the store–but we totally lucked out and found the black shelf marked $5.00 and the little book shelf marked $2.96 and both were half off.

Let me tell you– this has been a bustling kitchen… breakfasts, coffee, lunch and dinner and don’t forget dessert–lots and lots of desserts!!

Oh …and lots of soup

All served on a table the girls made out of some scraps of wood they found above the garage— and then painted with glitter paint. Yes, they are my girls!!

And when the meal is over….you must wash the dishes!

If you need any recipe suggestions, Ginger highly recommends this cook book

What’s cookin’ in your mud pie kitchen?

I absolutely love where we live. I also love tradition. I go out of my way to make sure we are making  memories together and carrying on family traditions. The 4th of July is one holiday steeped in tradition that  my kids really look forward to. Growing up, my parents always had a big 4th of July party–it started in the morning with everyone coming over for breakfast outside. Family came and went all day long. We swam and ate and then  moved the party into the garage in the evening. My dad and older cousins would blow off fire works in our back yard and a great time was had by all.

The apple must not fall too far from the tree.  We start each 4th of July at our Clintonville Community Breakfast. We walk over to the park early in the morning to begin our day.

One or more of my kids always participates in the pet parade

Then there is the fishing derby

And the party preparation

It is the part of the day that is the calm before the storm. Because the next thing I remember– It looked more like this

And this

This was before the fireworks show and the post fireworks snacking!! It was a late night. And today after cleaning all that up, I took a long nap–in the air conditioning. Hope your Holiday weekend was both fun and relaxing!!

Molly and her circus friends performed Saturday afternoon at ComFest. It was super hot!! ComFest takes place over three days. For so many it is the three days they look forward to all year. My son and his friends included. Our house is close to the bus that runs down to the park so we have had kids, many kids staying here this weekend. I am tired and looking forward to a quiet day tomorrow!

Here are a few more photos from the weekend.

Until next year—Happy ComFest!

Ice Cream for Dinner? Yes!

So, when my almost 15 yr old son asks for the 1 millionth time if he can drive home, I say YES – when you have your temps. And when he asks to drive around a vacant parking lot, I say YES. When my kids ask for ice cream for breakfast, I say YES- because you only live once and what really is the difference between good ice cream and a bowl of cereal or a yogurt?  Both are Dairy and sugar…. maybe some fiber? When my kids ask to have a friend spend the night, YES on Friday. Instead of the typical, NO! It’s Tuesday night and your Dad has to and I have to and  blah   blah   blah…(I bet I lost them at NO). Yet when I say YES, even if it is YES tomorrow, YES next time, YES I’ll ask Dad, YES when the moon falls from the sky…..They hear YES. It buys me some time to decide if I really need to say NO or can I somehow make this happen for them.

Saying YES is a meeting in the middle and my kids are really appreciating this. I would love to be able to give my kids everything they want, even their crazy, ridiculous requests! And each time I begin with a YES it feels like I can, even if it is when pigs fly.

I wrote this post back in March for another blog but was thinking a lot about it yesterday. I needed the reminder to take a deep breath and start off with “Yes” instead of  the arbitrary  “No” Old habits die hard-or maybe it’s the heat getting to my brain!