Pepper Paints

Our Holiday in Review

I absolutely love where we live. I also love tradition. I go out of my way to make sure we are making  memories together and carrying on family traditions. The 4th of July is one holiday steeped in tradition that  my kids really look forward to. Growing up, my parents always had a big 4th of July party–it started in the morning with everyone coming over for breakfast outside. Family came and went all day long. We swam and ate and then  moved the party into the garage in the evening. My dad and older cousins would blow off fire works in our back yard and a great time was had by all.

The apple must not fall too far from the tree.  We start each 4th of July at our Clintonville Community Breakfast. We walk over to the park early in the morning to begin our day.

One or more of my kids always participates in the pet parade

Then there is the fishing derby

And the party preparation

It is the part of the day that is the calm before the storm. Because the next thing I remember– It looked more like this

And this

This was before the fireworks show and the post fireworks snacking!! It was a late night. And today after cleaning all that up, I took a long nap–in the air conditioning. Hope your Holiday weekend was both fun and relaxing!!

More ComFest Photos

Molly and her circus friends performed Saturday afternoon at ComFest. It was super hot!! ComFest takes place over three days. For so many it is the three days they look forward to all year. My son and his friends included. Our house is close to the bus that runs down to the park so we have had kids, many kids staying here this weekend. I am tired and looking forward to a quiet day tomorrow!

Here are a few more photos from the weekend.

Until next year—Happy ComFest!

Hoopers, Hoopers Everywhere!

Friday night we went to our local hoopers meet up in the park behind our house. So many awesome and talented hoopers to watch and learn from!

Hoops of all sizes!

And so many awesome and talented hoopers!!

Even a fire hooping performance!

And they meet twice a week!! Can you tell I am excited?! Everyone was so nice–I can’t wait for the next meet up.

Are you looking for a group to hoop with? Check out Hoop City. Click on the connect button and see if there is a group near you.

Happy Hooping!!

Unsupervised Kids With Kool Aid …. gasp!

If you ever pass me while running you may wonder why I am smiling or giggling-it’s probably because I am listening to a funny podcast. I love to listen to podcasts and while I run is a good time to try keeping up with them all. Lately I have been listening to  The Moth, RadioLab, This American Life, Fresh Air—Love NPR!

Recently I listened to House On Loon Lake on This American Life. The story takes place in the 1970′s –back when I was a kid. The main character, Adam,  and his friends are pretty  young-I think the story begins when he is about 10. (I listened to this several weeks ago so I forget the exact details but have been stirring up this post in my head ever since)  Adam  and his friends discover an abandon house during their summer vacation. To quote from the website:

Adam Beckman tells the first part of his story, about how, back in the 1970s, he and his friends broke into an abandoned house in the small town of Freedom, New Hampshire. The home turned out to be a perfect time capsule, containing the furniture, letters and personal effects of an entire family … abandoned for decades. It seemed like the family just vanished one day, leaving salt and pepper shakers on the table, notes on the bedroom mirror, and a wallet with money still inside. Adam and his friends read the letters, saving some as clues, and never forgot.

The thing that really struck me about this story is the fact that these young boys spent their summer vacation-unsupervised, sifting through this abandon house for an entire summer.They were having an adventure of a lifetime. But the fact that they were actually having this adventure is what is so cool to me. Their time was their own. It was their summer vacation. It wasn’t over scheduled with sports  practices and games and camps and mini-classes and summer gym to free up an hour during the regular school year to cram in more credits for real classes. Nope–no schedules. It was summer vacation.

I too grew up in the 7o’s with this same sort of “supervision”. “Where you going? Be home by dinner time ” mentality. My parents weren’t any more permissive than other parents. They weren’t driving us around and taking us to see every cool thing that came through our town. We occupied ourselves. We rode our bikes, played in the woods and in fields. We went to the pool and ate candy and ice cream and drank pop on a regular basis.  There were few parents at the pool and even fewer at the park. We weren’t obese, we weren’t hovered over, there weren’t too many expectations of us other than maybe 1 practice and 1 baseball game a week, don’t leave your bike behind the car or in the sun because your kick stand would melt into the hot asphalt( and my Dad didn’t like that.)

We ran the neighborhood and beyond. On Friday or Saturday nights my family would gather at my cousins where we would eat steak ,baked potatoes , baked beans and salad and then run their neighborhood, sneaking into the golf course and playing kick the can across all the neighbors yards until well after the 11 o’clock news when  Hoolihan and Big Chuck would start.

I would often spend the night at my cousins and in the morning we would get up and have our “cherry bread” for breakfast. (white bread dunked in cherry kool aid–it was awesome!) Then we would get on our bikes or skate boards and ride down the big hill and hang out on Euclid Ave and in Coulby Park for the day. When we got too hot we would head over to the library for some AC. If it rained we played in the garage. We didn’t have cell phones and we didn’t keep ID in our pockets “just in case.”  There was no talk of  “stranger danger”  or Mean World Syndrome. (it’s a real phenomenon- I didn’t make that up! But why would we be surprised by this–there is fear and distrust everywhere). And kids today are missing this  freedom.

They are missing spending their childhood in a child like way. Kids are tagged and numbered and scheduled and carted around. They are safely delivered to their destination that is well with in walking or biking distance. They are helmeted, sun-screened and not allowed to trust their instincts. Don’t walk in the woods, check for ticks,  watch out for poison ivy, stay out of the mud, call as soon as you get there and wash your hands. Don’t talk to strangers, don’t dill dally and who are you talking to on the Internets?  Parents are making sure to cover ALL the safety bases these days! Kids have so many rules and regulations that when they do get a little bit of free time they don’t even know how to handle it. Let alone how are they going to handle life with out Mom and Dad breathing down their necks and telling them what to do. Can you say–go crazy with all the new found freedom?!

I will not and do not live like this. I want my kids to do daring and dangerous stuff. I want them to know their world and have a handle on it. Go–be independent and figure stuff out with your friends. If you need me I am here. ( But funny thing is, they don’t need me too much for that kind of stuff. They are self reliant and self confident in their world. ) I am a hands on parent but only to a certain degree.  And I think living in the real world where they are making real decisions makes all the difference.  I am not scheduling their days or their play dates  or their bed times. I want them to go into the world, the park, the woods, the bus,  the mall, the library, to restaurants and stores by themselves without me there controlling what they buy and how they spend THEIR money.  They are perfectly capable to interact with kids and adults and make most of their own decisions.

At a conference I attended John Taylor Gatto talked about how when Richard Branson was young his Mom took him for a drive and then stopped the car and asked if he knew the way home. He said he did and she told him to walk. He did and said it was one of the greatest learning experiences of his life. Extreme-yes.  But following your kid around with an appointment book and a bottle of water and a protein bar is also ridiculous.  Let them go. They crime rate in this country is at a 30 year low!!! For goodness sake–turn off your 24 hr news updates and quit reading all the bad news in the newspaper.  Read this article about how CSI Changed Parenting.  Don’t be so afraid to let your kids play outside and maybe even unattended! Let them have adventures. Chances are more than good that they will be unharmed and fine!! And the chances are even grater that they will have fun and learn more real life stuff  than you could ever artificially  schedule for them.

So who is going to join me on  Saturday May 22 for TAKE YOUR CHILD TO THE PARK AND LEAVE THEM THERE day??? Maybe this could be a small step for those who fear the reaper…leave your kids for just a short amount of time until you can get used to the idea that they will be fine with out you. And they can realize just how powerful they are to be able to navigate the playground on their own. There is still time. Summer break is still about a month away. You have time to wean your self from each other just a little bit so that kids can have real, unsupervised adventures this summer!

And don’t send them with water–send kool-aid–they like it better and chances are–that’s not gonna kill them either

What’s On Our Table

Last Thursday I promised to share a new Friday feature and here it is Monday already!  More about that in a minute. Last Friday we went to Slate Run Farm. If you are not far from Columbus, I highly recommend a visit to this 1800′s historical, working farm. They often hold programs here too so be sure to check their schedule.

As often happens in the Spring, babies are born on the farm-a few sets of twins even!!

So back to my new Friday feature— What’s On Our Table. As I said last week - I love to strew and leave interesting stuff around for my kids to play with. When I taught pre-school this was one of my favorite things to do; set up the environment for the kids.  I have a small table in my dinning room that I like to leave stuff out on for the kids to find. I usually change this every Thursday (when I clean).  I try to change it up as much as I can. So one week it may be a game  or magnets  or a card making station. I never put anything messy here. It’s usually something they haven’t played with in a while, an interesting book, things that wouldn’t normally go together or something that has a connection to something else in our world. Here is a wooden marble game the kids played with at the farm.

And here is What’s On Our Table this week.

Strewing is a great way to expose your kids to different ideas and activities. Things they may or may not find interesting. By no means are my kids expected to read these things I leave out or they must solve the puzzles etc… My only hope is that they find it fun or interesting. Who knows what will catch their eye and then they will be off looking for more information or a different way to do something. Sometimes these things spark an interest and sometimes not.  I am always leaving interesting stuff all over the house but I make a conscious effort to change this table up once a week.

My hope is to post What’s On Our Table on Friday’s—feel free to share what you have strewn at your house too!

I Choose You Happiness

Sometimes I don’t even know what I need. I go looking for one thing and find another. Sometimes I cast that odd other thing aside thinking I don’t need it and sometimes I hold on to it for dear life, like a new treasure to add to my collection. But funny thing is, that collection has to start somewhere. Often times it begins with a second or third or fourth exposure  (because sometimes I am slow, stubborn or deaf)  to that odd other thing that I cast away earlier. It keeps popping up and continues to catch my eye and then fills my thoughts and I begin to obsess over it. Then I go back searching for those tidbits I tossed aside earlier. I sort through stuff trying to remember wear I saw it. I find other things along the way to add in and after some back tracking and hard work I have the beginnings of a wonderful collection.

For years I have  had this vision of what I wanted my family to be. It sort of looks like an old Kodachrome, or an 8mm movie camera playing a film of strawberry blond kids, happily running through a meadow. Ridiculous, I know. But I am a visual person and the part that sticks out in that picture for me is the happiness and joy part of the picture. The part that I feel is missing from my picture,  my family.

At the end of 2009 I told my friends that I was turning over a new leaf. I was going to be a nicer person. When really I meant I was going to find MY joy and happiness. I think I have been looking for it in all the wrong places. No one is going to bring it to me, it’s not in a book or off of a shelf. Recently I  realized it  has been with me all along. And I didn’t even know it. Happiness really is a choice, it is within my power to just Be Happy. Stepping outside of my normal response or mind set is just a beginning of bringing on that  happiness.

I am going to tie this all together I promise!

Last week we attended The Unschoolers Winter Water Park Gathering for 4  days. This is the third year we have attended but this is the longest we have stayed and the most actual conference sessions we have attended.  These speakers said exactly what I needed to hear. Not what I wanted mind you, but what I needed. We rehashed these conference discussions 12 billion times over the next several days and a funny thing happened-I went from being dumbfounded and even pissed off a little to questioning and  then more discussion and then to an openness that I didn’t anticipate in the least.  See, unschooling is about so much more than just not doing school. It’s even more than just letting your kids decide how they want to fill their time and how they want to dress or not cut their hair and dye it blue. I knew that, but I learned again that  it is so much more also.   This is not the first, second, third or even tenth time I have read or heard or even been exposed to Radical Unschooling but it is the first time I actually listened to it.

I am not much in to  “the Secret” but that’s just me casting aside the odd thing for the second or third time now. But holy crap…I heard what I was searching for. Fate maybe? I do believe in fate. I didn’t consciously  put it out there, I wasn’t looking for joy at this conference. I was hoping to hear something other than Yes, your unschooler is learning all they need to know, Yes they can go to college, Yes, they will be functioning adults.  But not that I have the power to be happy and joyful right inside me-this whole time! I was there to hear about unschooling- Well I guess I  did put it out there that I wanted to talk about meatier subjects. I wanted a seasoned unschoolers discussion-even worse I helped lead that discussion. (But I am still not sure about “The Secret!”)

Of course I am living off the conference high since we returned but life feels easier and lighter.  Changing MY attitude goes a long way (about 90%) and simply realizing a few things:

*  Everything is a choice-I don’t have to do anything but I can choose to do it (the dishes, taking the dogs out for the 12th time in a row etc..)  Once I choose to do something it takes away the chore or dread and unpleasantness of it. I always thought this was stupid-just psycho babble-I have been humbled!

* Saying Yes  not my knee jerk No-OMG that makes life so much easier!!!!  HELL-O

*Simplifying and lowering expectations goes a long way in lowering stress levels and making everyone happier. -Duh

*My kids don’t care about the future (or the clean house or all the time it took me to plan, get, prepare and clean up food), they care about NOW (they want me NOW, not when I finish something else, to be present NOW,  not listening with one ear while multi-tasking) And they really want me-to spend time with them-what a huge compliment. I should  feel honored that they want to hang out with me!

*My family doesn’t have an agenda or pre meditated reasons for leaving their stuff around, It has nothing to do with me (detachment)so why be resentful??!

So much of this may seem obvious but it has really been a light bulb switching on for me. Some of it is just looking at things differently.  In a nutshell-I went looking for what I thought was Unschooling info and came home with so much more. So much information that I cast away as craziness  or just didn’t pay attention to while hearing it over and over again.  My collection is beginning to grow, so many new treasures and I plan to hold on to each new piece for dear life.

(My husband wants to know why it took me 1,000 words to say this! It was cathartic, honey!)

Nature Table

Over the weekend we went for a walk and collected many treasures .

It doesn’t take long to fill a basket or a bag with pretty, little interesting things. I am worse than the kids!! I love little collections of this and that. If you just look around my house you can easily see my love of “stuff.” I also love to arrange these little collections, to set them out in interesting ways, like little still lifes. Molly also loves to arrange and rearrange and set up little scenes. Ginger on the other hand likes to investigate and touch everything. And sometimes break things in the process

I had just the thing to organize our finds…an old printers box. I set the box on top of a small table and perched a mirror on the back. Instant nature table.

Ginger sorted out the pinecones, rose petals, rocks, acorn tops and nuts and pretty red leaves into their own sections.

Until all the little pieces had a new home!

Ginger spent a long time this morning moving stuff around and taping the tops back on to the acorns (and taking them away from the bad, bad puppies that think they are treats!)

So between Ginger and the puppies, I give this pretty little set up a couple of days until things are smooshed, mixed together, tipped over and dumped. But that’s ok…I know where we can get lots more ‘stuff!!”