Earlier this summer I was invited to a  pre-party of our local libraries summer reading program. My kids have always participated in this program. We are a family of readers so it is really a no brainer for us. Reading = get free stuff. Yet,  I didn’t go to the pre party because really in theory I am totally against the idea of rewarding kids with tokens and or coupons for reading. Yes=I am a bit of a party pooper. No, I don’t over analyze everything and get on my soap box tooting my horn at every main stream activity! But I saw this post on Controversial Summer Reading Programs and it gave me just the nudge I needed to finally come out of the closet.

Now, don’t get me wrong I LOVE our library and I especially love my local branch.  We visit our library as well as other neighborhood libraries often. We rely on our library and appreciate all they do for us. But I just can’t get comfortable rewarding kids (or adults) for reading.  I didn’t (still don’t) want my librarians to know this-I am embarrassed to admit this to them. I just don’t have very high hopes that they could even begin to understand my reasons. They see me as one of their best patrons and I feel like I am letting them down by knocking  their attempts to get kids into the library and reading more. Rewards for this, rewards for that, rewards for reading over the summer too?  There must be a better way.

I don’t live in the dark-I realize that most every family  lives by these arbitrary rewards.  ( Some may even try to call them incentives.)  Homes and schools are run this way; allowance for chores, stickers for pizza parties, candy for potty training, money or presents for good grades.   I call them –just another way to coerce kids into doing what adults want. It’s all a cover up kids!!

Back to reading programs–It is true that these programs start off working as an incentive to read or at least to check out more books. (which is great for libraries–higher circulation is a primary goal of libraries. Higher circulation = more money)  Kids gear up by visiting the library and checking out lots of books and that is a great thing! Then  for 20 minutes–(checking the clock the whole time) they/you  read a book and then get to mark off a square. How many times do they bring that sheet to you asking, “Can I mark off another one? Can you read some more—-so I can mark off another one?”  See what I am getting at? It may seem like it’s all for the love of reading but it’s not–it’s for the love of filling in the stupid square and the the stupid free bookmark or  book bag or back pack that they are rewarded for finishing the summer reading program. How many parents get pissed off and just tell their kids–”Fine! Just mark off 1 square!”  *(clue #1 -kids know if they finish quickly they will get their reward)

I wonder if this reading enthusiasm wanes after they get that backpack?  We hope not-we hope the Summer reading Program turns kids into “readers” but it is doubtful that book marks and bike raffles are going to have that lasting effect on young readers.* (clue #2-once kids get there prize they are not keeping up the frantic reading pace) There is an alternative.  Really, you can avoid all those yucky feelings about keeping track of the chore called The Summer Reading Program.

As I said earlier–We are readers and my kids participate in the summer reading program and yet I am against rewards for reading. But I have a sneaking suspicion other families are going about filling in there squares a little differently than we are. As  readers, we read books, the newspaper, magazines, listen to books on tape as well as podcasts. We read while on the computer and while playing games and writing out lists or following directions both in the car at the grocery and while texting and while cooking.  These same encounters with reading are happening in your family too I bet. Reading is reading. Not just when you set the timer and read from a book.  Sort of how you can’t stop learning new things, and how school isn’t the only place to learn them. Well the summer reading program, like schools leads you to believe that reading occurs in a box  and rewarding this not only takes the enjoyment out of it but it belittles the sheer act of reading by placing an extrinsic reward on it.  I know I am a party pooper! I love a good book and totally love snuggling up with my kids to share a story. And I am all for that kind of reading too!! (I know there is a difference between reading a book and day to day literacy) But for us, ALL reading counts towards those little squares. If my kids ask if they can fill in a square I always say of course you can! See, it doesn’t matter if the timer was set or the reading was taken from a library book. You can feel just fine in saying “Yes to the square”–it’s not cheating. Use it as an opportunity to show your kids just how much they are reading. Probably more than you and they think!

So, we don’t keep track of how long my kids read from a book that someone else deems as legitimate reading material and thinking I need to make sure my kids are following the rules of the program or keeping it secret that I let little Johnny fill in a few extra squares (even though we quit reading at 15 minutes instead of 20).  In the end it is all about the prizes for the kids. Yes, they may be reading more for a short time during the summer but isn’t there a better way other than tricking them into it? And why does reading have to be a competitive sport? Isn’t it meant for totally selfish purposes?! Getting the facts and pure enjoyment?

I am not fooled by these programs–we read all the time. We feel fine filling in the squares and taking advantage of the coupons that we can use to get good stuff! I don’t use these programs to coerce my kids into pressured reading for extrinsic rewards. If you think I am batty-which is fine-you can check out what best selling author, Alfie Kohn has to say on the subject!! There are studies that prove these reward based programs are even hurting your summer reading program participants.

Can’t libraries offer new and exciting programs to lure kids in. Come on–get with the times. Kids read while playing video games!! Bring in some game designers and pull some of those books off the shelves. No, they may not be the classics but they are full of words and kids like them! Have an American Girl Summer Reading Club complete with doing some of the crafts from the books-reading the directions as well as the stories. Have a skate boarding or break dancing demo with those non fiction books pulled as well as those that lead the demo share some of their favorite books.  Have a rapping story time. Wouldn’t that be awesome?! Comic book writers could hold a workshop also. ( I am full of ideas if you want to hire me!!!)

I know there is so much more that is behind those little boxes that I don’t have answers to. Not all kids  live in literacy rich homes. But really , it is just not right to give kids stickers for reading. Don’t be fooled by thinking success equals a high number of participants and circulation. Don’t be fooled that these programs are producing kids that love to read. Maybe these summer readers are really fooling you-

*clues #1 and #2 show just how kids know how to work this rewards system

Yes-that’s right there really is a National Learn Nothing Day and it is today July 24.  So let’s take the day off from learning today, give ourselves a break. It’s only one day-surely we can slow down  for just one day to take it easy and learn absolutely nothing.

If schooled kids can take the whole summer off and do nothing, unschoolers can can take just one day.

(Did you even know there was a National Learn Nothing Day?-Well there you go you already failed! Try again!)

How will you learn nothing today? or any day???????  Good luck

My two older kids learned how to hoop years ago. They have taken a few hooping classes and practiced on and off for years. They can do some tricks and walk around and keep the hoop up and going around effortlessly for hours.

These photos are from a few years ago at circus practice. I on the other hand never could get the hang of hooping.  Even as a kid I just couldn’t get the hoop to stay up. It always looked so fun but I also felt self conscious that I couldn’t do it so I didn’t practice at it much. And just figured I was just someone who couldn’t hoop.

Now fast forward to  this year. One of the great things about the internet and blogs is being able to see how other people live. I have been loving the new wave of unschoolers that have taken their lives on the road.  I have been  living vicariously through these families whose blog updates I  anxiously await just to  see what “we” are up to in our customized RV!  I so wish we could pack up and go–live an adventure on the road. But alas-my family says NO!  So as I sit here and dream I notice that many of these women have taken up hooping. They look like they are having so much fun.

And then Sara posted this giveaway and I entered thinking Molly would love a new hoop. But as I began clicking around her post I found that Lara and Superhooper were taking their hoops on the road and heading towards Ohio. Without a second thought I contacted Lara and invited her to Columbus.  And with that I decided eff it I was going to learn to hoop.  I didn’t care if I looked foolish. For three days my kids tried to teach me. Nothing. I watched countless how to hoop videos on Youtube and even checked a hooping book and DVD out of our library. I was dreaming about hooping.  Then it happened!!! On day 5 finally I could keep the hoop up for a minute or two. And each day it gets easier and I don’t have to make such huge exaggerated movements to keep the hoop up anymore!!! YEAH for me!!

Ginger learned too. But she is learning much faster and is working on tricks already. She literally went from not being able to hoop at all to using 2 full size hoops in less than a day.

One of our hoops broke and with 4 hoopers and being down to 1 hoop we needed more…we had to have more! So we went to Lowes and bought our supplies. (There are instructions and tips all over the internet.)

irrigation tubing  160 psi  3/4 inch

3/4 inch connectors

various colors of electrical tape and duct tape  (we found some metallic tape at a craft store.)

you will also need a hack saw and a blow dryer

Don’t be intimidated this is super easy

Measure your tubing –your hoop should come between your navel and your nipple.  The bigger the hoop the easier it is.  Mark it and cut it with a hack saw.

Heat one end with the blow dryer to soften up the tubing so the connector fits in easier. This only takes a minute or two. Once it is warm shove the connector in half way.

The girls wanted their hoops to make noise so we added rice to the tube

Next heat the other end and connect the tube together as close as you can get it. Then we wrapped a bit on electrical tape at this point to keep it together snugly.

Next–decorate your hoop however you want using electrical tape and  duct tape. The duct tape is a little slippery and wrinkly for hooping so electrical tape is recommended but we used both.

As soon as we finished we went and hooped in the dark in the back yard! There just isn’t enough room in the basement for three hoopers—unless we stand on the furniture!

Looks like we are set now! The white hoop in the front is actually an LED hoop that my husband made for Molly for Christmas a few years ago.  If you are local and are interested in joining us for free classes with Lara let me know!!! She will be here next weekend. Happy Hooping!!

Taken from Enjoy Life Unschooling’s April blog carnival theme

This months theme is “To Open”.

• The name April is of Latin origin, and its meaning is “to open”.
• What does that mean to you?
  
• What doors do Radical Unschooling open?
• How have you “opened” since discovering unschooling?

Have fun, get messy, make mistakes

What does open mean to me?           To be ready to experience things that come my way. To let go of preconceived ideas and notions of things or the way things “should be.” Not letting fear run my life.  This is something I have to work on everyday. Acceptance of things the way they are.  This is hard for me because I like to be in control. It is comforting for me. In some ways this is a really good trait. I am organized and love taking care of details. But I can go overboard too.  Yet, the more I let go and open myself up the easier it is becoming to really live in the moment and trust that things will work out the way they are meant to.  I don’t have to try to control everything to go my way. What a relief!

What doors do Radical Unschooling open for me?          Most of my control is just an illusion but still a comforting one.  So I get how hard the idea of unschooling is for some people. Just the idea of letting go of all that control you think you have is really hard. But when I do let go, little by little it becomes easier to free myself of so much baggage.  I can really see  and feel who I really am. Not who I was” supposed to be” or how my neighbors see me or who friends think I am. But who I was meant to be.                                                                                                                                                                            Learning to let go of the seeming control I had over my kids has been huge! Fighting over arbitrary rules because I thought that they were necessary. Doing things just because everyone else was and what would they think if we didn’t?!  How awesome that my kids can have this true love and acceptance now. They don’t have to wait until they are adults to lose all kinds of crap; assumptions and expectations that were put upon them  just to  eventually find themselves—the selves they were born to be.  They were born to be just who they are supposed to be  until we try to change them to fit a mold to make things run seemingly smoother.  I say seemingly because now I know how much easier  an unschooling life is.  How much easier it is to live life on our terms everyday instead of the school systems way or our parents way or the mainstream way.  Our life is not an illusion. It is everyday real!

How have I opened since discovering unschooling?           Unschooling has opened this path for me. The real trust that you have to find and develop to unschool has opened my family up to so many possibilities. To choices I never knew were there. We really are free to make decisions, not coerced or biased decisions but what we really want. And we can do that because we are open to support and trust each other.                                                                                                                    And now to show just what an unschooling geek that I am:  I relate everything in my life to unschooling. It is so weird how I find evidence everyday, multiple times, that shows me just how right and perfect this unschooling path is. I hear a story on the radio or I read something,  I see someone loving what they are doing.  All things that don’t have anything to do with unschooling per say–but somehow I can find a link. Just another way unschooling has opened me up to hearing and seeing more and more just how natural unschooling really is—ok I’ll stop now! (I told you I was a geek)

I tried to fix the funny spacing–(that isn’t there on purpose)–but the spaces aren’t on my draft-sorry.

Where to start?! The media is, well the media. They are a business.  They feature stories that will boost ratings.  They use shock value  to stir up attention and in turn receive more viewers.

So why we are surprised by  both the Good Morning America and the  Discovery Health reports on Unschooling?  They are typical examples of  biased reporting.  Both were short segments filled more with shock value than facts and true glimpses into real unschooling.

Mainstream America just doesn’t get Unschooling. They aren’t going to.  For heavens sake only about 25% of American adults have a face book account. I thought everybody was on face book! So imagine how the majority of the world could possibly understand Unschooling?  Especially with the shows that Discovery Health and Good Morning America put out. Yet, it is so easy for me to forget that we are radical. It is so easy for me to forget that my family is so different than almost everybody else.

Partly because I don’t reflect the mainstream and haven’t for so long.  I have my own  fairly large community that I identify with. I belong to a food co-op and rarely shop at Kroger and I love my public radio station where they don’t play anything you have ever heard of. —–That’s weird…… Yeah, I guess.  I recycle, compost, use cloth napkins, shop at the thrift store and line dry my clothes—-Oh, your one of those hippies!….. OK.  My kids don’t go school—-Oh, you homeschool? Will you always do that? Do they socialize with other kids? ……No,we Unschool—— Huh?????? Like those crazy people on TV? Did you see that, they let their kids eat donuts for breakfast—– That is main steam media for you!

I don’t sit round and think about how different we are. We just live. We aren’t purposeful in every move we make. We aren’t living for “the unschooling movement.” We don’t look different. We don’t walk or talk differently. (well maybe a little differently   ) Our daily life is pretty uneventful to the outside world. We get up and go about our day just like everyone else. Only we have learned a little secret that seems so unfathomable to the rest of the world.    Choice

We all have them. Really we do have  choices in everything we do. Yes, some choices make life harder than others but  we have choices in life. And as Unschoolers we have made many, many unpopular choices.

Kids don’t have to go to school–gasp! They don’t have to get up at a certain time of day to be productive—gasp! They don’t even have to be told to learn!  No, really, it’s just automatic. Adults may think they have control over what kids are leaning but kids and adults everywhere are learning ALL THE TIME!

I googled learning and Wikipedia gave me this: (from a very mainstream source even!)

Learning is a process you do, not a process that is done to you. Traditional education focuses on teaching, not learning. It incorrectly assumes that for every ounce of teaching there is an ounce of learning by those who are taught. However, most of what we learn before, during, and after attending schools is learned without it being taught to us. A child learns such fundamental things as how to walk, talk, eat, dress, and so on without being taught these things. Adults learn most of what they use at work or at leisure while at work or leisure. Most of what is taught in classroom settings is forgotten, and much or what is remembered is irrelevant

1. ^ Russell L. Ackoff and Daniel Greenberg (2008), Turning Learning Right Side Up: Putting Education Back on Track (pdf) HTML. Retrieved February 18, 2010.
2. ^ Greenberg, H. (1987), “The Art of Doing Nothing,” The Sudbury Valley School Experience. Retrieved February 18, 2010.
3. ^ Mitra, S. (2007) Sugata Mitra shows how kids teach themselves (video – 20:59). Minimally Invasive Education, Retrieved February 18, 2010.

These choices we have made are hard. And Unschooling is a journey of sorts. The vast majority of unschoolers did not wake up one day and decide to make all of these radical choices in one day. But it is easy to forget that.

Beginning with following your heart and letting go of what other people think. It’s your life –who care’s what other people think.  Really–let that go and be the real you. We only have one this one life to live. Live it the way you want to.

Then giving up  the ” should do’s”  and the  “have to’s”.   Really question why you are doing things. Do you really want to? Or are you just doing them because you should do them? What will really happen if you don’t do them? Can you live with that result? Can you make a different choice to get the end result you want?  Then make your decision based on that. It  is a process.  These choices we have made seem so normal and automatic to us now that sometimes we forget how the other 99% of the world is living.  There really are so few have to’s in our lives but we assume that we must do way too many of them. Don’t follow blindly. I want to make my life just what I want it to be. And fill it with what I want. You can to. You have a choice.

So to the outside world our life may seem uneventful but really it’s just the opposite. Really we are choosing to exercise our choices. We aren’t living lives full of have to’s. We are living fully everyday. Not just on the weekends or when we go on vacation. Not just when we have time. And you can too. You have a choice–to put your kids in school or homeschool or really trust yourself and  live your one life freely and Unschool.

I am so excited!! I am sort of a geek about healthy food, and fermented food is my latest health food.  It seems like I am not alone. I  have been seeing and hearing so much about fermented foods lately, I couldn’t wait to try to make some of my own. Fermenting foods makes them more nutritious. These cultured foods grow bacteria, probiotics that are so good for your gut.  I found this book at our library–WILD FERMENTATION  THE FLAVOR, NUTRITION, AND CRAFT OF LIVE CULTURES   by Sandor Ellix Katz.  He also has a very informative website called Wild Fermentation. There is so much more to say about how good these foods are for you, Sandor covers it well in both his book and website.

And I also read a yummy blog post by my friend Sheri.  But sometimes I have trouble getting started with something new. I can research things to death. Very un-unschooley of me!! So I have been looking on-line and at blogs gathering info. Today I decided to just try it–and really it was easy.

I  started with Ginger Carrots.

I grated 4 cups of organic  carrots (not peeled as there is lots of good stuff especially minerals you don’t want to wash or peel off)   Put into a bowl and add 1 T grated ginger and 2 T salt.  Immediately the juices started to release from the carrots. This is just what you want to happen. Then I filled my wide mouthed mason jar and added just a tiny bit of water to make sure they were totally covered in liquid.

Look closely—can you see the bubbles–it’s alive!! Really-that’s what makes it so healthy!

I left plenty of head space and capped loosely to let some of the gas escape.

I used good salt. Look it says ALIVE!

I read that you don’t want to used iodized salt. You need to use large, wide mouthed jars which I have not invested in yet nor have I found any at the thrift store-so I used mason jars and an old pickle jar.

Next I made sauerkraut. I used both green and purple cabbage. I grated it up in the food processor and put it in a large bowl.

To that I added 2 T of salt and  1 t of dill seed and 1 t celery seed ground up in a coffee grinder.

After thoroughly mixing it all up with my hands I packed it down into a jar and topped off with a bit of water. Again leaving head space and not sealing too tight.

I put these into a bowl to catch any overflow that might escape. And set them in a dark spot on my counter.

I can not wait to taste these. I will do a taste test in 3 days to see how they are coming along. I read to test at days 3, 6 and 9. When it suits my taste refrigerate. I am so excited at the possible combinations and to try other fruits-yes fruits and veggies and spices Mmmmm.

We have been a little busy around here hunting for eggs and eating chocolate so my posts are a bit behind. This week on our strewing table I set up a little letter and card writing station because April is National Card and Letter writing month. And who doesn’t love to get some mail???

I made a stop at our Dollar Store and picked up some pretty Spring paper, blank cards, envelopes and some colored index cards. I filled a desk organizer and added in some pens and pencils.

I also bought some alphabet wall stickers at the Dollar Store. Ginger still often asks not only how to spell words but what letters look like. “Mom, what’s a “Y” look like” And often times it’s not so easy as “A “V” on a stick.”  So the visual is a great help!And cheap and temporary.

And because it’s so much fun when the real mail man leaves something in the mail box for you—-I have sent my kids some mail that they should be receiving any day now!

Now a little bit about reading and writing and choices and unschooling.

My 11 year old is dyslexic. Yes an unschooler with a label. It’s OK with me. Because all that it means is she learns and see’s things differently than most people. She needs help reading and spelling. I knew something was up when she just couldn’t sing the alphabet at 6. No biggie really but just one of the first things I noticed. We had a quick, free evaluation done and they suggested dyslexia and more expensive testing. We rushed home read all the reccomended books, started the make the very expensive appointments that all had waiting lists months long. Then I spoke to a nice man at a resource center one day and he mentioned that all that expensive  psycho testing would tell us that yes she is dyslexic and you can try X or Y to try to “fix” it. So we should just save our money and just try X or Y.(Because according to the “experts” there really is only X or Y).

So we tried some tutoring from a local self titled reading doctor that ended up being a horrible experience-I would like to just wipe it out of my memory. She is crazy in the reward, coercion, punishment crazy sort of old school way!!! I will not speak of her. Done.

The X “cure” was Orton Gillingham tutoring. In other words $$$ tutoring. But an organization in our area offered free tutoring. Excellent. IF you have an actual diagnosis. Which we didn’t have because we canceled all of our expensive appointments. I talked to my friend who is a psychologist for our school system and she told me to call and set up free testing through the school system. As a tax payer-those services are available to me. To make a long story short-the tests were long and grueling for Molly. When we met for results (words like severe and profound were used) and the school system realized we had no intention of using their schools they very happily handed over the dyslexia diagnosis. This is something they just do not do. Because they do not treat specific learning disabilities they always diagnose to what they can help or teach–non specific learning disability.  So-we got our “dyslexia label” and called about the free tutoring-only there was a 1 year waiting list. But I was promised that this place was so great that they could “cure” Molly of her “problem.”

So in the mean time we met with a Kindergarten  teacher to tutor Molly once a week. Molly loved meeting with her. She was young and hip and in the summer time even came to our house 3 mornings a week to read and play literacy games with Molly. Then we got the call…the experts had room for her.

We began the free tutoring this past fall on a bad note. The reading center is completely un-child friendly. It is stark, boring and very unwelcoming. The women who run the place are cold and stuffy. So immediately there was that hurdle.Yet  Molly’s tutor was wonderful. She was fun and nice and warm and everything the center was not! But she had a teacher that she worked under and the teacher often sat in on the sessions offering Molly’s tutor suggestions and would push Molly to try harder. The directors were not very encouraging-they scolded me for waiting so long to begin “The Program”,  “She is profoundly, severely dyslexic”,  they were sure to inform  me on several occasions . Really–she doesn’t have an incurable, life threatening disease ladies. Never working on her strengths but harping on her weaknesses.  The twice a week-middle of the day- tutoring sessions were becoming more and more stressful for both Molly and myself. She didn’t want to go and called it stupid. I had a bad attitude that I could no longer hide for the sake of a “cure.” The last straw came on a day in January that our regular tutor was ill and the teacher tutor sat in for her. This woman told me Molly’s handwriting was barely legible.

I hated her. I hated the fact that Molly always took such pride in her handwriting and now they found something else “wrong” with her. I could barely speak-I told the woman “Molly has beautiful handwriting” and she just walked away from me.  That was the last tutoring session we had at that center.

Soon after I attended a discussion on right brained learners led by Cindy at Apple Stars.  After hearing Cindy speak, I knew we had made the right choice. If you ever have a chance to attend one of her talks, I highly recommend attending! If you have a right brained learner–she will make you cry. She is wonderful! And so full of positive information. She also has a Yahoo group for right brained learners that you may want to check out. Her blog is full of info for living with right brained learners. Trusting them, following their lead and meeting them where they are. All of these things are so important with any child-not just one who doesn’t fit in the box. Yet it sure makes life easier and much more enjoyable when you don’t try to squish a pear through a key hole.

Yes-it is super hard to be an unschooler and address a learning differently child-I wrote earlier that I don’t mind the label because it gives me a starting point at how to help Molly. But I won’t let it define her. And I think this is exactly what was happening with all the tutoring. It was becoming the center of our week. And it was feeling yucky. Molly has so many gifts and talents that are far beyond those of us that can read. So we are really concentrating on letting her thrive in those areas. That is wear her interest is so that is how she will learn to read and spell.  Setting up and strewing a card and letter writing station like this gives her a chance to show off her beautiful handwriting. Right now we are taking the focus off of what she can’t do and putting the spotlight on ALL that she can do. And it is so much. Dyslexia is just a small part of her.